


Memories

by Sondrox



Category: Undertale
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Loneliness, Loss, One Shot, Past, Post happy ending, Post-Canon, Promises, Reminiscing, Ruminate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 06:08:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30034233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sondrox/pseuds/Sondrox
Summary: Nobody knows what Chara does when she's alone at home. However she's never alone.
Kudos: 7





	Memories

**Author's Note:**

> Fanfic directly inspired by this image https://www.deviantart.com/wolfifi/art/My-Friend-And-I-577967051 made by Wolfifi, all credits for it to them.

**Hidden companion, phantom be still by my heart, make me a promise, that time won’t erase us, that we were not lost from the start.**

Chara entered the kitchen with an outfit of clothes in her hands and arranged the outfit on the chair of the small table that was inside the kitchen. She brought two pieces of Toriel's pie and placed one for herself and one for the outfit on the other side of the table.

The house was in dead silence except for the sound of the fork against the plate. Chara was completely alone and she knew she would be like this for at least the next couple hours until Frisk and Toriel arrived.

She did nothing but stare at the outfit across the table as she fiddled with a heart-shaped necklace with a pained smile that she struggled to maintain.

“Frisk wants me to have more friends, so he...he introduced me to this monster, his name is Monster Kid...he reminds me of you. But...it just, it doesn't feel the same and...it hurts, every time I see him. Every time I play with him, or with anyone or I do something with anyone, it's so boring. Even with Frisk and…I just don't know why. And all I can do is pretend that I am having fun, that it makes me happy. And the only thing I can focus on is to keep smiling, to not alarm anyone. Like I did when we lived with Mom and Dad.

“Except when...when I was with you...no matter what happened, or how bad I treated you, you always smiled at me. I remember when we went to the Waterfall, and you gave me that necklace and we promised each other that no matter what happened, we would never lose it...” Her lips began to tremble. "And...still, I still have it, I swear, I still have it." Chara waited for an answer.

"Please believe me." Chara mumbled, nothing. "Look, damn it!" She took off the gold necklace and held it in front of the chair. "But how!? How in hell do I explain that I don't care about the necklace!? What I care about is that you are with me! If you gave me just one sign, one! I’d break this fucking thing without thinking it as long as you come back. Everything is so boring without you. Every time I find something that makes me a little happy I just think what it would be like if you were with me. It hurts me to see you there without talking to me, only to realize you won't be back.

“…” Chara rubbed her face yet again.

"Sorry, okay? I didn't appreciate you enough. If I could I would change what I did that damn day. But I can't because Frisk is in control of the timeline that piece of–!

“I...I’m sorry. I shouldn't have suggested that...I understand...if you…if you do this to punish me, I deserve it. It's my fault. I think is just better if Frisk has that power and not me. It's just, you're the only one I want to sit in that chair. You are the only one I want by my side. "

She let out a tired sigh. She knew that whatever this was, it didn't make sense and yet she couldn't stop this. Every. Damn. Time.

After a while she moved into the living room and pulled out an old, crumpled box that contained an antique board game. Every time it was Asriel's turn, Chara would switch to his side and move his tokens for him. At the end of the game she just let herself lose on purpose, hoping that Asriel's victory would make her smile as she remembered the times Asriel implored her to let him win.

“Stop being a crababy.” Chara used to tell him.

And now she couldn't play with anyone anymore. The game was so old that she doubted there were people left who knew how to play. Except of course for Asgore and Toriel with the dozens of times they all played together. But as much as she wanted to, she knew she couldn't ask them to pretend everything was like before.

Especially after learning that her parents were divorced. As much as she wanted it wouldn't be the same.

She could teach Frisk. But Chara always thought it wouldn’t feel the same either despite of how similar Frisk and Asriel were. Or even herself and Frisk. A voice in her head told her that Frisk didn't deserve her rejection. And in a certain part, it was right, Frisk always strived to remain on Chara’s good side, and that was clear to her since the moment Frisk brought her back to life.

And not satisfied with just that he always supported and helped her in everything she asked, as if she were a street dog who everyone pity her and that's why they adopted her. They saw her and say "Poor darling". The mere idea of that happening made Chara tremble with an impotence that she always tried to stifle by clenching her teeth.

"Stop being a crybaby." Now Chara told herself every time she cried.

And now she was the crybaby. And instead of trying to calm down to stop crying. Bury all her emotions and pretend they did not exist and draw a perfect smile as always. She forced herself to remember every moment with Asriel until Chara lay sick and dyingh in that bed of golden flowers with her best friend in front of her.

As much as she hurt, she clung to those memories to not leave them behind.

If she didn't forget, Asriel was still alive. True?

Part of her mind wanted to believe it was okay if she didn't want to feel that pain anymore, another part of her mind always said no. That part of herself that she always sought to do something. Whatever, just to ignore what she had in front of her. Maybe one day her pain would get smaller and smaller, to the point that it is nothing but a distant memory, but Chara knew it would always be there. And she would just cope with something she had yet to find.

Her mind continued to be flooded with memories until the alarm of a cuckoo clock of an orange and red bird with in the living room brought her back to reality, it was not long before Frisk and Toriel arrived, she took Asriel’s outfit and the game and took it to her room and tucked it under a loose board under her bed.

Shortly after Frisk brought her back to life, she returned to her home in the Underground, and in her room, among all the outfits she had of her that looked exactly the same.

This one. This one was from him. She took it without telling anyone and kept it in her room. Every time Chara was home alone, she would take him out of her and pretend that Asriel was with her. She couldn't get rid of it even if she wanted to, it was his souvenir, it was his essence, it was his anima.

It was his memory.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there!
> 
> If you like it please consider leaving a review and adding it to favorites, it would make my day.
> 
> Also, if you like this, i'm sure you'll like my other work so consider reading it, and if you want to know a bit more about myself or my fics visit "sondroxeng.wordpress.com" Here I'll be posting my thoughts about my fics as I publish them as well some non sense stuff
> 
> See you around!


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